When the past knocks
by Allen-uke-chan
Summary: Tomorrow Mello is going to win, isn't he? Or will he lose everything in the end? And Matt's childish behaviour isn't improving the situation. Suddenly Mello is confronted with his past, his present und his future at the same time. MelloxMatt


Hey there ^--^ I'm German so please forgive me my mistakes ... If you find some please note me - I really appreciate your support! : D

When the Past knocks on the Present's door

and the Future is opening

For Sasori-chan – Best wishes from ArtIsABang-UN 3 (my nick name on )

A tapping noise disturbed the silence, which lay over the room like a veil. A tapping noise produced by the permanently pressing of buttons. A tapping noise from an adult ginger head playing with his PSP on a dusty sofa in a house, which didn't belong to him.

It distracted him. Like a hammer it beat itself into his head. Nervous as he was he sat – well, more lay – in his armchair watching the other one on the sofa playing with his game boy thingy. It was so distracting. Annoying. He hated it.

The room was nearly dark, just a small table lamp flickered on the couch table between them. The flat was dirty, used and full of trash. Around all the garbage were lots of computer equipment, cameras and spying software. From the outside you could hear the siren of a police car, people talking – well, more like junkies buying their stuff. But it wasn't as noticeable as this fucking tapping noise the ginger head was making.

"Matt, would you please cut it out already? It's freaking annoying!"

He watched the one in question and raised an eyebrow as he didn't seem to react at all. Sweeping his blonde strand out of his eyes, he shot his friend a threatening glare.

"Just…one…mom...ent, Mel-," replied the player eventually with a cracked voice like he was seriously concentrating on speaking. So not multi-tasking-capable.

Mello breathed out heavily, rolling slightly with his eyes. He was thinking. Thinking about tomorrow, thinking about what will happen to him, to Matt, even Near and Kira. _His plan_. His plan will take place tomorrow. He could win. Or lose everything.

AND HE COULD NOT THINK WITH THIS NOISE!

Even the fucked-up drug addicts on the streets weren't that annoying.

"Quit your children's game, you unsocial bastard," Mello nearly yelled – he wasn't good in hiding emotions, he never was. He leaned forward in the soft cushion still observing his childhood friend in an almost aggressive manner as he wanted to shut him down just by his looks. Well, actually that was exactly what he wanted though it hadn't any effect when the target didn't notice it at all.

With a sudden movement Matt put his PSP beside him, grinning like mad to the blonde Mafioso like he wanted to hide the fact that he just lost this game. "Sorry, Mello, you know how much I love those games. They are relaxing," he tried to comfort his comrade and started to rummage around in the pockets of his pants. "Were you jealous? How cute of you," he muttered as he dragged a package of cigarettes out of his jeans.

Mello snorted out loud, shot a furious glare at the redhead and shoved a piece of chocolate into his mouth. "As if," he scoffed and began exploring the grayish ingrain wallpaper. "Matt, you should get yourself a social life – I mean you want to fuck this stupid second Kira girl…"

Dammit, now it really sounded like he was jealous. But he wasn't, he just wanted to think properly without tapping noises and giggling blondes.

The addressed one raised his eyebrows at that. "I didn't say anything like that, she is just cute. And you're the one to talk – These Mafiosi of yours seemed pretty Chome, 'sure you aren't getting molested?" he tried to defend himself, making the vein on Mellos forehead

grow bigger and bigger, "No one's molesting my cute little Mello!" he finally added to ease the atmosphere the blonde was creating with his _evil_ expression. Maybe he was completely insane now? This would have been fun.

It was the most delicious thing on earth to provoke a really sexy, diva-like dressed guy with middle long natural blonde hair who happened to work together with the American Mafia to achieve his goal which happened to be the surpassing of a 19-year-old white haired autistic genius by finding Kira. Best thing in life!

Since Mello was remaining silent - "like he could control himself" Matt chuckled to himself – the ginger head had to think of something new, something incredibly mean. Mello looked sexy being angry. And so the gamer was always prepared.

They hadn't seen each other for how long? Nearly five years. Five depressing years full of spare time which was used to made up a plan. You can call it revenge, you can say it was a game.

It was both.

~ * ~

Mello, man, I kinda feel nostalgic today," said Matt out loud, exhaling the toxic smoke into the already stuffy room. The blonde didn't respond at once, then he slightly turned his head to see his friend into the eyes. He made a serious face. "Me. Not." As expected - Mello didn't like talking about the past. Because there was one thing in his life he seemed to regret, well, rather he was embarrassed about and Matt knew it. The fun could begin. NOW.

"Aw, Mello, you're a meanie, you always were. Back then at Wammy's were as moody as now. I can remember when we used to get out together," the gamer reminisced happily leaving a short pause to see the reaction of his partner. This said partner was biting off a piece of dark chocolate – his favorite type – and under his unimpressed face he wanted to hide his interest. And sure he had taken interest into this subject. "The first time we slept together," Matt chuckled on this thought, "you were pissed off and claimed, I'd do everything wrong. You see, you are a meanie."

With a sudden movement Mello stood up. His lip twitched turning into a smile – for the first time this evening. "You deserved it. You said that I would be girly so I had to be on the bottom. And I hope you are better now," Mello smirked adding, "for your future lover, I mean." He stretched his arms and went to the kitchen bar, star tapping onto the wooden counter with his fingertips while thinking about what they could eat tonight. It was neither his refrigerator nor his apartment at all. If an apartment could get stolen, then did Mello and Matt steal this one from some heroine-junkies. Wonder where they were now… But they left some drugs behind. Mello sold them getting a good amount of money. Life can be so easy (for some seconds).

Now the ginger head laughed running his finger trough his fire red strands. "Yeah, that's true. I love to tease you, you should get used to that, my dear," he sniggered under his breath inhaling the cigarette smoke again. "You know what I can also remember? You and Near. Together."

There was silence running through the room like a berserk gone labor rat. After a long pause which seemed to be years a heavy breathing filled the filthy room. "Stop. It."

No, it wasn't aggressive at all. Mello was nice and friendly. Love-spreading like always. And it was absolutely not like he wanted to kill Matt in this moment. Love and peace for everyone.

But Matt.

And especially not for Near.

"Hey, Mello, I've got some pretty cute pictures. 'Belonged to L before he died and they gave 'em to me since neither you nor Near were around." The blonde couldn't see his childhood friend facing him with his back, but he intentionally knew that his colleague, his friend and (sadly) his lover of childhood times, that _this_ gamer was smirking. Smirking like hell behind his back and this gave him the creeps.

Pictures? Suddenly he knew things wouldn't end up well. Stop-motion-like he turned around, facing a grinning red haired man holding a photo in front of him.

No, not that one…

~ * ~

_When you are young everything has a different meaning than to your present ego._

_Everything, everyone. The world is much more fascinating, much more colorful. It is divided into good and evil, into nice persons and not nice persons. This is a child's thought. Simple, to the point, naïve. And even if they were geniuses – They were still kids. Abandoned from their parents due to their intelligence. People had other plans for them. _

_They were all alone having each other and childish dreams._

_This is why Mello loved Near. He was there when nobody was around. He filled the silence with his tireless games. He loved the sound of puzzle pieces falling onto the hard parquet or the dices dancing over the floor. Near was autistic, he nearly spoke always observing his environment. But that didn't matter as long as they had the chance to spend time together. _

_They were just four years old when they came to Wammy's house. They already spoke and wrote better than a seven-year-old. But like any kid they loved playing…especially in sandboxes._

_A hot summer day about 15 years ago. The sun shone onto the green meadow behind the orphanage. Kids were running around chasing each other, the teens relaxed in the shafts of sunlight. And in the sandbox – like always – sat a blonde boy fidgeting with a sand mold in front of an absent-minded natural permed white haired boy. Into the middle long blonde hair was a slide plucked. It has a pink shaped heart on it, holding the bangs off his face. _

"Hey, Near, Near – look," he cried out happily still waving with the toy in his hands. His smile was as huge as possible. In front of him stood a half finished sand castle.

_Near aimed his eyes on his friend and took the small dithered hand into his own. "Calm, Mello. You destroy your castle", Near said slowly. They looked into each other's eyes for a _

_long moment still holding hands, feeling the warmth. Mello had a sheepish look on his face but then he smiled even wider. Near was always so steady and foresighted. Not like Mello – emotional and rushing. _

_And now Near was grinning, too. He had this really stupid looking smile where your press your lips tightly together and your cheeks get these adorable laugh lines. It was unbelievably cute._

_In this moment a young boy approached. His black hair hung messily into his pale face. He held a camera between two of his fingers and … took a picture. _

~ * ~

Mello was looking exactly at _this_ photograph taken by L. And he thought he had destroyed any kind of evidence of his existence.

He snorted and gave the redhead an insulting look. "Dirty bastard, gimme this, I wanna burn it!" he yelled. And only a second later he came running towards the grinning 'bastard', ripped the picture out of his hands and … stared at it.

Yeah love was a funny thing. It comes as fast as it goes but in the end – you will never forget about it. Forget about the things you once loved so much. Even if you start hating it, it will always be in your mind. Such a complicated matter – it made Mello sick.

Near was ALWAYS better than him – it drove him crazy. Though the white haired never wanted to rival Mello, the blonde misunderstood it completely and eventually they ended up hating each other. Well, Mello ended up hating Near. It wasn't the other side around.

Good that there was a certain video-game-loving teen to fall in love with. And finally to fall out of love to be just friends. _Just friends_.

His slovenly blond strands hide his face and he shivered. Shivered from…Anger! He was so angry right now, how could Matt dare bringing this photo with him, rubbing it under his nose? Such an awful shot. Who put this stupid hair clip in his wonderful hair anyway? Insulting him, a scrupulous Mafioso, like that! His lips twitched, his brows came tightly together, he wrinkled his nose and his eyes narrowed to slots.

"Ahaha –haha…" And now Matt was laughing like he had gone insane. He held one arm in front of his face because he actually cried. "Cute! You should have seen your expression! Too funny." The bastard continued giggling and he lay into the soft cushion of the couch just to drop off it a second later. Now he was rolling around on the floor. Stupid Matt, really stupid Matt. _Really stupid cute Matt!_

"Argh Matt, stop it! This is embarrassing, you gonna threaten some people tomorrow and now you're rolling on the floor like a little brat! And I wanted to think! Great, now I've got a headache," Mello grumped, adding, "I'm going into my – err _his_ – bedroom and you will keep out, perv."

With this words he stormed out – still clenching the photograph in his right hand. With a loud crack the door fell into the lock. Matt was sure he could hear Mello kicking some kind of

nightstand or something similar.

Well. Maybe he went a bit over board. And another cracked noise filled his personal silence. Yep, he definitely went too far! Maybe he should…er, no. Mello overreacted all the time. He will calm down and will laugh about it tomorrow. No. No, he won't.

But…

Enter the same room as Mello in such a situation means death. A dreadful, long and painful death.

~ * ~

He sighed heavily, running his fingers over the photograph. He tipped on the young smiling boy who sat next to his younger and smaller ego. "I'm going to win, Near. I'm going to be L's successor," Mello muttered to himself and put the picture on the night table. It was a challenge and now it was his turn to win. He was going to win. He wanted it so badly – he was shivering. His pulse ran, his heart beat fast.

He definitely was going to win!

He lay down into the bed with a disgustedly expression. He didn't want to know who or _what_ has already slept in here. The room was as dirty as the last one but now several clothes were lying around and some things Mello wasn't sure he wanted to know. _Just ignore it, don't think about it…_

Stripping himself to his underpants he hopped under the blanket. As soon as his head hit the pillow he drove off into an airy nap. A messy half-day-dream was playing in front of his inner eye. And the second he realized the content of this dream he startled. Suddenly he found himself sitting on the mattress. Sweating and his throat hurt like it was on fire. "_Matt,_" he said shakily and his voice was cracked. The pictures repeated themselves in his mind.

A shot, a second one. The loud noises kept going, and there was Matt. The bullets tear his clothes, his soft skin. He was panting, smiling his last foolish smile. The blood dropped into the street, dunking it into a red puddle.

It felt like he fell down into a big black whole under the bed. Sickness captured his entire body. With pleading eyes he looked toward the door. That wasn't the way it's supposed to be! Matt shouldn't die because of him – That was just wrong. He was his best friend, he knew him for ages, since he was little. He can't – he can't die like that. Not because of _him_.

"FUCK," he cried out, took the desk lamp next to him on the night stand and threw it against the wooden door – leaving a scratch on the surface. "FUCK. FUCK. FUCK!" His breath was heavy, his heart beat itself nearly fatigue. He clutched his legs. Shaking. Sweating.

With a loud sound the door opened. "Man, Mello, what's-"

Matt stopped grinning embarrassed und stormed towards the…crying?...No, but nearly crying blonde. His hands landed onto the other's shoulders who tensed immediately under the contact. He raised his head really slowly looking into his friend's eyes.

"Matt, please don't die."

Silence filled the room and they just stared at each other for a long time. Their breathes were at the same rate. Calm and steady.

Suddenly the ginger head grinned widely. "No, that isn't my intention. You need someone who tease you, don't cha? Man, you're absolutely adorable caring for me!" Laughing broke the stillness but it ended abruptly.

Mello pressed his lips onto Matt's in a nearly aggressive manner like he couldn't bear one second without feeling him. The surprised gamer embraced his childhood friend pleased and closed his eyes happily. The blonde opened his lips not more than an inch but Matt's tongue slipped into Mello's oral cavity - and then they let go. Focusing each other warily.

_Love was a funny thing. It comes as fast as it goes but in the end – you will never forget about it._

Mello never forget about Near.

And Mello never _ever_ forget about Matt.

He didn't regret leaving Wammy's House but the fact that he abandoned Matt like this after everything they did was always hunting him in his dreams. He felt ashamed for so long. But by the time they were meeting again no one was talking about that issue. They were just friends from childhood. They fell out of love a while ago, didn't they?

Then why wasn't it feeling strange and uncomfortable? And why did a simple kiss cause such a tingly sensation into his whole body? Why did he felt the urge to kiss his friend in the first place? Because he wanted to be with him as much as he can. As long as they are alive they shouldn't waste a second.

He wanted to feel Matt again.

He wanted them to have sex.

Hastily he pulled off the redhead's shirt and threw it onto the floor. Matt fondled over Mello's blond hair. He liked it pretty much – always reminded him of a cute little flower girl though Mello was neither little nor a girl and cute in a different way. So it didn't make sense at all, but who cared? He loved it.

"Hey, hey, calm down Mello," the ginger head insisted calmly as the other's finger started to unzip his pants. "Do you want to use me? 'Coz I like you too much to ignore it afterwards," Matt said smiling bitterly. Stupid Mello didn't even have a clue how _he_ was feeling. That he loved him for the first second they met or that he waited for a call after the blonde left the orphanage six days without sleeping or eating properly. It was so naïve and childish. But this was who he is. A playing boy.

"Ah common shaddupp, would ya? I dun wanna talk 'bout that now." Mello nearly panted and reunited their lips once again. It was so damn good he couldn't get enough. Matt was pushing him into the hard mattress, freeing himself from the pants which were quite disturbing.

Then Matt smirked. "You know, I would have thought you were sleeping in some kind of leather underpants and a corset. Like a dominatrix, ya know? But you are wearing totally

normal plaid boxers."

He laughed loudly into the ear of his friend starting examine it with his tongue. It tickled but Mello's expression went again to annoyed. "Shut up, bastard. You will never get me play dominatrix except in your perverted dreams, but baby, then it's just you and your hand. Not funny at all, _ya know_?" countered the Mafioso diva-like, slipping his finger into the fabric of the other one's boxers which were by the way bright red as his dyed hair. In an instant the underwear was gliding downwards. Kissing, Mello slipped his slender fingers into Matt's crotch. He groaned out loud and bit slightly into the lips of the blonde. Running his hands trough the soft strands he let Mello play with him for a while. He was out of this world. In heaven to precise. He panted thus he couldn't breathe. It was so hot. He vaguely noticed that the man under him was undressing himself impatiently.

"Come on, Matt," he begged groaning like he just ran 1000 meters in two minutes. Matt gazed at the beautiful face beneath him. His finger wandered to the scar. He didn't think it was disgusting but Mello showed immediately a defensive reaction. He turned his head away blushing a bit. Just a bit.

"Hey, baby, don worry, you are _the fairest of us all,_" smiled enthusiastically.

"_Queen, thou art of beauty rare, but Snow-white living in the glen__ w__ith the seven little men__is a thousand times more fair,_" Mello muttered more to himself and didn't even realized he actually said that out loud_. A childhood memory, something stupid you will never forget._ "You know this by heart? How cute of you, my little Snow-white", the ginger head laughed poking his friend into the side. And then finally with a last exchange of looks and smiles, Matt thrust himself into the beloved body under him, making Mello scream. His nails ran deep into the gamers back. Unsatisfied and satisfied at the same time.

It was just like then. It was different. It was totally good.

~ * ~

Breathing heavily they lay next to each other. Mello took Matt's pale hand, squeezing it.

"Matt, you promise you won't die?" Mello asked quietly into the now silent bedroom.

"Of course, baby. If you gonna stand by me?" The ginger head smiled in return and pulled the smaller one towards him to embrace him again. Now he definitely won't let go of him _ever_ again.

"Don't be so romantic, doesn't fit you at all."

"And you are the most controversial Mafioso one could think of! First you're like 'Man, I've got balls and I gonna shoot you without mercy' and on the other hand you're such a crybaby. All in all – you can't deny it – you are a diva." Matt kissed his boyfriend onto the forehead waiting for a reaction.

"Better than being a social bastard."

And with this words he started laughing. Relieved that Matt was still with him even after so many years. His plan didn't matter right now. He just wanted to keep the moment like it was. Simple and perfect.

And he didn't know the end of this story, though he saw it coming…

The photograph lay innocently on the floor …

This happens when the Past knocks on the Presents door and the Future is opening.

THE END

~*~


End file.
